What a big deal

A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.

Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. "Can I help you?" The man said, "Sure. I've come to install the phone."

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Update ^.^...Tmr still gt CT(MT&maths)...GL my friends...And Yuan Xiao Jie Kuai Le..

((`'-"``""-'`))
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/`;#'#'#.-.#'#'#;`\
\_)) '#' ((_/
#. ☆ ☆ ☆ #
'#. 我爱你! .#'
/ '#. .#' \
_\ \'#. .#'/ /_
(((___) '#' (___)

First Flight

Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents, so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.
His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.
After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, don't they?"
"Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground."
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Still gt 2 more paper....GL to all my friends...XD

Don't be selfish

A mother is admonishing her son.

Now, John, don't be selfish. Let your little brother share the bicycle with you.

But Mother, I do. I ride it down the hill, and he rides it up the hill.

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Going sleep soon...GL to all my friends..XD

A preacher is buying a parrot

Are you sure it doesnt scream, yell, or swear? asked the preacher.

Oh absolutely. Its a religious parrot, the storekeeper assures him.

Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lords prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm.

Wonderful! says the preacher, but what happens if you pull both strings?

I fall off my perch, you stupid fool! screeched the parrot.

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Feel Unhappy

Son: Is it wrong to give anyone mental or physical hurt when he felt unhappy?
Father: Of cause, it is.
Son: Fine, now I am feeling so bad. I lost in two subjects this time.
Father(angrily): What? You------

Three pastors

Three pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, You know, since summer started I’ve been having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church. I’ve tried everything----noise, spray, cats----nothing seems to scare them away. Another said, Yes, me too. I’ve got hundreds living in my belfry and in the attic. I’ve been had the place fumigated, and they still won’t go away. The third said, I baptized all mine, and made them members of the church...haven’t seen one back since!

Dinner's ready

My cooking has always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as I prepared dinner a bit too quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both of my children had received fire-safety training at school, they did not respond to the alarm. Annoyed, I stormed through the house in search of them.

I found them in the bathroom, washing their hands. Over the loud buzzing of the smoke alarm, I asked them to identify the sound.

It's the smoke detector, they replied in unison.

Do you know what that sound means? I demanded.

Sure, my oldest replied. Dinner's ready.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I nid go sleep liao byebye all my friends XD...